Unless it changed in later versions, Diriel will NOT romance a drow character (that was my first run through with this mod, too). Your best bet is to reroll or use a save game editor such as Dale Keeper to change your race there (not sure how you'd cheat up the "love talks", though). He should still chat with you, though
Also, nothing really picks up until after the prologue (while it HAS been awhile since I played IWD2, my sister assures me this is true)